Ten Dimensions for the Weekend

You know what? It's been a long week. Sometimes, after a long week, I can only watch a stupid comedy or indulge in some other mindless activity. Other times, I have to explore a topic that stimulates the parts of my brain that starve in the ad agency environment. This is one of those other times.

As I was blowing off some proverbial steam during lunch today, I encountered a Kitsune Noir post about the ten dimensions of our universe. Forget that silly Donny Darko crap KN prattles about and just take some time to geek-out on this explanation of these ten (theoretical) dimensions. If you're like me, it'll clear your head. If not, it'll might just hurt your head.

More on these ten dimensions, plus the book for which this video is a promotional vehicle, here.

Out of Optimism, or Not?

"I am not a pessimist; to perceive evil where it exists is, in my opinion, a form of optimism." - Roberto Rossellini

Most people assume I'm a pessimist. Maybe you've come to the same conclusion after reading a few choice posts on this little blog of mine. I've been called a pessimist to my face more times than I care to count, by friends, associates and even mere acquaintances. I like to counter them by claiming that my level of optimism is such that I'm disappointed in my fellow man for not knowing better, having more common sense, behaving more responsibly, being more respectful of others, and so on. I don't think I'm either one of these -isms, though I can admit that I swing toward the side of pessimism. So what.

The way I see it, the total optimist creates unreasonably high expectations, inevitably leaving people unpleasantly surprised by the facts of reality. The pessimist, on the other hand, creates reasonably low expectations, which leave people pleasantly surprised when reality turns out better than originally expected. I'm more interested in coping and understanding the nature of things than I am in pretending and ignoring it. Not saying it's right for everyone, but it feels right for me.

"Optimism is the madness of insisting that all is well when we are miserable." - Voltaire

You know what makes me feel even more pessimistic? People who assume that pessimism (read: realism) is a bad thing. Not long ago I was asked - by someone I thought knew me better - to be an endless fountain of optimism. Spraying anyone nearby with a sticky-sweet outlook on an imaginary world where none of us really live. Rose-tinted glasses, even when I have perfect vision? All I can say is that I'll try; I'm not an optimistic person, and the very fabric of my personality is unlikely to do a complete U-turn. Only an optimist would think that possible, right?

"Optimism: The doctrine that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly, everything good, especially the bad, and everything right that is wrong... It is hereditary, but fortunately not contagious." - Ambrose Bierce

If you're the type who has always experienced an optimistic world, I can understand why you're stuck there. It's a safe place to hide from reality. Pessimism works the same way. But, practically speaking, the pessimists may be more likely to survive in the long run. For example, see Dumb Little Man's 8 Reasons Why You Shouldn't Always Be An Optimist.

"Pessimism, when you get used to it, is just as agreeable as optimism." - Arnold Bennett

Do you think Dumb Little Man is a pessimist for posting that information? Or is he optimistic in the sense that he can help his fellow man lead a more fulfilling life through the sharing of this information? Post a comment and let me (and my handful of readers) know. Thanks.

No News Is The Best News

If only CNN and the other 24-7 news networks would do this instead of repeating the same sixty minutes of programming, twenty-four times a day. I'd watch the news more often, which would get their advertisers more exposure to my much-coveted "young adult" demographic. Just a thought.

Wait For It

I just read on the Captivate network (elevator news at work, piped in by Gannett) that scientists are trying desperately to develop an anti-aging pill. A pill that fights the affects of aging.

A pill that fights the affects of aging? We've had that for years already. It's called birth control. From the moment each of us is born, the one thing we all do is age. The only way to stop that is to not be born. Fact is, we're already living longer than we were biologically meant to. Let's not forget that living longer doesn't mean living better - we still fall apart as we get up in years. Think of how much of your life is spent just making a living. Now imagine that going on longer than you ever imagined. And with silly elevator news snippets that remind you of your inevitable mortality.

To be fair, despite Captivate's sensationalized paraphrasing of some actual news, the true development appears to be related to longevity and life expectancy, judging from this recent Wired article. But living longer is not the same thing as not aging, is it? We all have to wait at least another ten years to see if these pills even do anything.

Meanwhile, maybe contemplate your life in terms of quantity versus quality.

[Photo from AmazingAbilities.com]

In The Event of [ ____ ] Disaster

Having worked in advertising the past eight years, I've encountered a few worst-case-scenario assignments. The most memorable were in anticipation of Mad Cow disease and bird flu. Thankfully, none of those scenarios came to pass. But having gone through the exercise of "what if, and then what?" gives me an appreciation of this William Safire-penned speech. Written for Nixon, In The Event Of Moon Disaster prepared for some unforeseen catastrophe that would have prevented Apollo 11 astronauts from returning to Earth from the moon.

Fate has ordained that the men who went to the moon to explore in peace will stay on the moon to rest in peace.

This first sentence is a blatant reminder that politicians rarely speak with such eloquence any more. Where there was an implied sense of reverence and respect for the American public in Nixon's day (yes, I am aware of the irony in that statement), now is self-congratulatory smugness and complacency, if not mild retardation. Something to keep in mind with the election year approaching. Then again, if the wrong candidate wins again, there's always the burgeoning space tourism industry - and a potential to escape not only to Canada, but perhaps our nearest celestial neighbor.

[via Kottke.org]

Takin' Care of Business (Time)

Life events have kept me from blogging much lately. Starting about two weeks ago, my cell phone died. Two days later, my 4-year-old iPod died. The day after that, the PC on which I produce music shit the bed. All of this might've sent me out to a ledge if it weren't for some other, more positive happenings.

Like this: my lovely girlfriend Maria and I got engaged. No date yet, but a nice ring on her finger if I don't say so myself. Statistically, I'm on my way to living longer than my bachelor friends. Coincidentally, that buys me more time to finish my ongoing music projects like INSTILLE, FIGORA and others who have yet to be named.

Oh, yeah, and we've fallen hard for Flight Of The Conchords.

Dance me to the end of funds

There's apparently a lot that Leonard Cohen has been trying to keep from the public. This article calls it "a sordid tale involving allegations of extortion, SWAT teams, forcible confinement, tax troubles and betrayal."

The first thing I thought was, this is much too juicy for pander-happy cable networks to pass up. I am going so far as to predict a Lifetime Original, based on Cohen's former manager's perspective, to go into production any minute now... And this tale of a Tibetan Buddhist suing a Zen Buddhist would no doubt be sponsored by shampoo and cosmetics, department stores, quick-serve restaurants and the fad diets to which QSR customers resort, plus superfluous prescription medications that promise all kinds of "pharmaceutical enlightenment" that include dozens of unhealthy side effects. Perhaps I am more predicting that the premise of disambiguation will be sold (as it already is) through strict employment of ambiguity.

The next thing I thought was, this seems like the kind of thing that only could happen to Leonard Cohen. However ironic they may appear, these are rather epic, poetic circumstances - even for someone of Cohen's outlook. If my hunch is right, maybe he'll get to pick who plays him in the movie.

Dark is the suede that mows like a harvest.*

The European Space Agency has discovered what it believes to be ice on Mars. Thanks for saying something about it, BBC! Our domestic news engineers were aggressively ignoring Europe's success in space by reporting on the same thing California scientists said about a different object just over a year ago. Well, that or the space walk.

It's probably safe to assume that NASA doesn't want to you question its authority any more than you already do. It seems the agency is putting a softer spin on this latest mission, particulary its similarities to a disaster in recent memory. I don't mean to be morbid, but NASA might reconsider having return in the shuttle mission's title.


* - Obscure Mars Attacks! reference. Didn't want to do the obvious "needs women" Mars joke, and "pump up the volume" was too much of a stretch. Like this post needed any more hyperlinks.

X-ian zombies want to eat your porn-riddled brains!

Mind Hacks has a post about a conservative group that's raising money to conduct studies in the hope of proving that porn is an erotoxin. The term is a neologism coined by an anti-porn activist, so you know the ratio of actual science to irrational conservativism is low. This pushy, "holier-than-thou, but out-of-touch-with-reality" christian conservativism reminds me of the "Xian Zombie Vampyre" chorus from My Life With The Thrill Kill Kult's "Days of Swine & Roses" (on Confessions of a Knife). Someone had to point this out, because these irrational christians are the real zombies and zimboes.

Homo Urbanus

According to the UN, half the world's population will soon live in cities. This comes as no surprise when you consider that we're well into the Information Age, we're consequently placing more value on culture itself, and cities physically represent our cultural centers. A higher population density means a higher rate of meme-churn (did I just coin a new term?); a higher/faster rate of cultural evolution. More people tend to yield more ideas, simply put. More complicated, however, is the urban sprawl that ensues.

(article link via Kottke)

Wait for it...

Golden Palace Casino, where are you on this one? Or this one? We all know these auctions are still cheaper than an advertising campaign, and we all expect you to keep bidding and buying your way into the news... Don't let us down.